You finally land a date with a hot chick that youre attracted to, and you show up at the door with flowers and candy. Youre thinking, Good job, Tiger! Well, while you may be telling yourself that, the woman on the receiving end is thinking something entirely differently.
Flowers and candy were once thought to be romantic or a gentlemanly gesture. That was also in the days of Leave it to Beaver. Times have changed, women have changed. Things that worked back then, just dont work now. They dont carry any merit, and in fact, they actually may hurt you. Let me tell you why.
What you thought was such a sweet gesture on your part, just told the woman you are taking on a date a very different thing. To her, flowers and candy represent a wimpy token of appreciation in hopes of receiving her attention in exchange. They are unoriginal, lack creativity, and are just plain cheesy. You might get a fake smile in return, and maybe a hug if youre lucky, but they will both lack sincerity. Strike ONE!
Not only will they lack sincerity, but you have just lost any ounce of respect you were hoping to establish. Any ordinary fellow can pick up flowers, so you have to do something to set yourself apart from those other guys.
Try something different. Think about every conversation that you have had with her. If you were listening, she probably told you more than enough about herself to give you a clue on her likes and dislikes.
Where did you meet her? At a coffee shop? At a book store? At the mall? Bringing something of context to her will show that you not only are attentive, but are proactive about it. If you bumped into her at a book store, do you remember which section you were in? What she was reading? Pick up a book of the same author or topic for her. You cant imagine how many brownie points that will earn you.
And before you show up for your date, have something about the gift in mind that you want to talk about. Dont think that her heart and affection will be yours upon receiving the gift. You have to know WHY youre giving it to her, and be able to articulate it at the same time.
In the book example, do a little research on the author. Find out what types of books the author writes. Maybe check out some editorial reviews that you can borrow to make it appear that you know what you are talking about. And at the very least, it will show that you went the extra mile to look up one of her interests.
In her mind, if you get into something just because she is interested in it, that will show her you can express similar enthusiasm later down the road. And if she starts picturing the near future with you in it, thatll do so much for the current date you are going on.
Trust me, youll see more enthusiasm on her end, which will make for an engaging date for the both of you. And you know what that means...usually another date very soon.
So, to sum up the key points of this installment...
1. NOOOOOOO flowers and candy. Did I get my point across?
2. Be creative. Bring something of context.
3. Research before you give her the gift. And have something articulate to say about it.
Follow These 3 Steps for a Perfect Date
Posted by mike on Dec 05 2008 under gamespaceserial.com |
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